Humor – Page 7 – Jeff Maddox

January 6, 2016January 6, 2017

3 Amigos

It’s funny how we mark moments in our lives. Memories are made in the most random of ways and are usually referenced by a certain month or year in which it happened, or triggered when the friends we choose to surround ourselves will remind us of how it really was. Certain birthdays, a time of day, a street address, a highway sign and the list can go on and on. Numbers can make us do crazy things, and those lifelong friends poking and prodding each other along the way don’t help much either. Those same lifelong friends that have been through it all with you are the same ones that will be down for anything. Anything? Why not?

If you’re fortunate to have friends like this – friends that have always been there – count your lucky stars. Usually time erodes bonds and distance will put us in places where our closest friends aren’t. But when the opportunity comes, we can make up lost time as if it were the 80’s once more. Friends are always friends no matter the length of time or the distance we are apart. These guys seem to have had the luxury of keeping distance to a minimum, wouldn’t you say? You only live once, but friends are forever.

I recently found three guys who fit this description. Friends since they were 14 years old, they have hit the milestone of age; that magical age of 50. These three friends who live in the U.K. are planning a trip to the United States to ride US Highway 50 across this great land on Indian Motorcycles. Credit for this inspiration might have a little to do with Charley Boorman, who is known for taking life by the handlebars and living it to the fullest. This isn’t their first trip to the U.S. for sure, but this time it will be different. They will be riding highway 50 at the tender young age of 50 years old. Traveling coast to coast with your best mates sounds like something I would love to cross off my bucket list. Mid-life crisis? Probably, but who cares? Of course timing is important, as they are due to set off on their journey in May 2016. As luck would have it, highway 50 runs just south of where I live and I’m hoping to take a day and ride with them through a part of Kansas. I’m 53 and that’s close enough for me. Anyway, mom always told me to act my age, not my shoe size. She also said if all my friends jumped off a bridge would you? Hmm.

So please follow the 3 Amigos on twitter @ Ride50at50 to see how their #route50 adventure is going. Send them a message and wish them luck, but more importantly, if you see three friends on motorcycles acting their shoe size instead of their age, let me know!

December 30, 2015

2015 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 8,700 times in 2015. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

December 29, 2015February 13, 2016

Mind Over Matter

So 2015, it’s been nice knowing you. I’m not sure about the “older you get the faster time flies” thing because it seems this year has lasted longer than 365 days. And besides, when did I get old? Who am I kidding…

I know one thing for sure, if how I felt was a true measure to how old I am, I would not be able to buy beer. Of course, I don’t feel that old. My mind is still telling my body that anything is possible, and it is more mind over matter anyway. Just tell that to the guy behind the counter at the liquor store.

So for 2016 I will make some promises to myself. Not the usual lies I tell myself every new year, but the ones that really, truly matter. Why we always pick the beginning of the year to make these random claims of personal improvements is beyond me, but here I go;

Laughing More – I need a huge belly laugh where the snorts and snot come from my nose. The kind where Diet Coke comes spraying from my mouth like a split radiator hose. Admit it, you want to laugh like that too.

Working on My Health – I know, right? My mind is telling the matter down below everything is fine, but at my age I know better. I need to stretch, walk and eat better for the health of it. Why? It’s the right thing to do and I can only imagine I would feel better. And besides, a nice evening walk gives me plenty of time to think. My motorcycle does the same thing but without all the cardio.

Take Some Time Off – I need this for my mental state. I’m not sure if this is good or bad, but I’m sure it will depend on how I use this time off. Beer and Nacho Doritos or stretch, walk and be active? Mind over matter, right? I also want to take a ride someplace I haven’t been on my motorcycle. Maybe to the southwest. That’s where Nacho Doritos are made right?

Be a Better Listener – Pay attention and be present daily. Or better yet, shut up and let people talk. I have been told I’m a good listener and I have the stories to back this up. I have perfect strangers tell me things they may not tell anyone else. It must be the perfectly timed concerned nod I give.

Sunrise and Sunsets – I talk a lot about my morning and evening rides on my motorcycle reflecting on how beautiful these are and how each one is unique and beautiful in its own way. I also know others are looking at them too from their own perspective and vantage point, but from now on I’m going to appreciate the beauty of both the visual and spiritual sides of these daily wonders. The beauty as it happens and how and why it happens, and in turn, give thanks each day for this amazing gift.

Appreciate – So much wasted energy is given to those things we cannot change and I will dedicate this energy to appreciating all that is around me. I will also communicate my appreciation to those who are important to me. I hope you don’t mind, because this matters to me. Get it?

One thing is for sure, every day is a gift and there isn’t any point in wasting it. Make the most of your time spent on this earth and give it all you have while making a positive difference in someone else’s life.

December 7, 2015December 7, 2015

5 Reasons Why New Riders Should Choose a Dual-Sport

Here is another great article from Ania!

There are plenty of different reasons to get into biking, and there are several options when it comes to style, performance and size. Everyone can afford to be fairly specific when they choose their perfect bike and there are some great entry-level options in any class, but dual-sports bikes just lend themselves well to beginners. You can get a spry little 250cc Ninja if you like sport bikes, or a competent Suzuki TU 250x if you prefer cruisers, but there are certain features that dual-sports offer that make them a great learning tool for your first year or so of riding that these other bikes simply lack. Here are a few good reasons to get a dual-sport as your first motorcycle:

1...

It’s easier to learn the basics of bike riding on the dirt

The number one reason to recommend this type of bike to a new rider is the fact that you can take them off-road and practice away from all the traffic and pedestrians. You can spend hours riding around the dirt without worrying about bumping into things, making a considerable amount of damage or even hurting yourself badly. Falling on concrete is a much rougher experience than hitting the grass or mud, and practicing for hours on uneven terrain will make riding around town later feel like child’s play. You still have to be smart and careful, making sure to wear all the necessary riding gear, but it is a much more private and safer environment to learn the basics.

2...

2. They have a wide variety of uses

You can’t take a sport bike out into the forest, and you can’t expect a smaller cruiser to be very agile. Not only can you ride around in the dirt having all sorts of fun, but you can then simply clean up your dual-sport and go round some errands around town. These bikes are often modified for adventure touring, where people ride for hundreds of mile across countries and even continents. Those are bigger and more powerful versions of course, but even entry-level dual-sport bikes can carry you over moderate distances, be it on concrete or off-road, on business or for pure pleasure.

3..

3. Your experience carries over easily to other types of bikes

These bikes have some similarities with most other types of motorcycle. The seat is a tad bit higher than on other bikes, but you are seated upright like you would be on a cruiser, the handling and performance are somewhat similar to those of a sport bike and the general look and feel is a hybrid of off-road and urban bike features. You can a dual-sport as a learning tool and then graduate to any style of bike you want, and you’ll get used to it very quickly, or you can just buy a more powerful dual-sport if you want.

3..

4. They can be tons of fun and handle very well

These motorcycles are built with performance in mind. Even the lighter and less powerful models feel very fast and responsive, and can give you quite the adrenaline rush, particularly if you ride them out in the open country. Hitting a calm side road is always fun and exciting – you get a chance to speed up a bit, hit a few corners and enjoy the moment – but when you have the ability to go off the beaten path and do some exploring any time you like, you will have a hard time wiping a huge, goofy grin of your face.

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5. A dual-sport can take a beating and keep going

A big issue for new riders is the fact that they will take a tumble at least once during their first year, and there will be plenty of times where they just drop the bike or bump into things when parking. It is a necessary part of learning to ride, but with some bikes this can mean spending tons of money on bodywork and various repairs. Being an off-road as well as a city vehicle, a dual-sport bike is built to take a beating and keep on trucking. You don’t have to worry about bumps and scratches too much, and the bike might last years and years.

There are probably a few more things dual-sport lovers could add to this list, but these five are the core reasons why any new rider should take a serious look at these sturdy and incredibly fun motorcycles.

December 1, 2015

I’ll Take That Bet

As a half-inch of ice covers my little world, I find myself walking past my motorcycle in the garage wondering if it will ever see sunlight again. I know it will, but at the end of November it feels like a warm(er) day of riding is a long way from today.
I have been known to ride through the dark days of winter and as long as it’s not dangerous, I can put up with cold temperatures. I draw the line however, at dangerous or soon-to-be dangerous roads. There are too many things out of my control when dealing with the weather and those other folks that have their hands on the steering wheel sharing my little piece of asphalt. Like pulling up a chair in Vegas at the blackjack table you have to know when to hold’em and know when to fold’em. Ice? I fold’em.

So when I ran into the owner of this motorcycle, I had to question his sanity. He left central Missouri on his way to York Nebraska for Thanksgiving, stopping just long enough to warm up and make a phone call or two. It was on the Wednesday before the holiday and it was cold and over-cast but dry. He said he was returning on Saturday, and me being a junior meteorologists and the proud owner of a crystal ball, I told him there was no way he would be riding back on Saturday. He proved me wrong, but he also proved me right at the same time. I was wrong about him coming back by on Saturday, but I was right about how riding in the winter is all about mental fortitude. He was soaked through and through. His leather jacket and insulated bib overalls were heavy with drizzle and his gloves were dripping from the ice that was melting on them. He was in high spirits considering his situation. As for me, I would have pulled over long before I got to this point. Not that I don’t have the fortitude to ride in the cold, and for that matter I feel I would have been a little more prepared by wearing a proper rain suit. But the roads were only going to get worse and the traffic was heavy due to the holiday. In other words, not a good hand at the blackjack table and it was not a good bet to continue on.

So after a handshake and a pat on his shoulder wishing him a safe trip, he climbed aboard his bike and took off heading east with another 3-4 hours of road ahead of him. Knowing he would arrive at his destination after dark, I knew the worst was yet to come for him. The glare from the headlights off the icy windshield and his full-face helmet would be sketchy at best and all of this while being tired and cold. I hope he made it safely. I hope he knows that complete strangers were worried about him. I hope he knows how dangerous it was to be doing this.

I know one thing for sure. He made a promise to me on Wednesday that he would return, and he did. A man of his word – and I have a feeling he made someone else a promise that he would make it home safe and sound. Safe travels my friend and I know we’ll meet again.

November 2, 2015

More Than Words Can Say

Pictures really do say more than words. An image can bring words to life and put both the writer and reader right there on the same page, so to speak.

With technology today, we have forgotten how to thumb through pages in photo albums during a family get-together. The heavy pages were full of memories yellowed by time and fuzzy like the stories we told about each image.

Time passes and memories may fade a little, but they’re our memories and as long as we can record them – whether digitally or on film – they will be great memories.

October 29, 2015February 13, 2016

Destinations Unknown

The kind of road that feels like walking through the house you grew up in. When you can walk through the house in complete darkness and not bump into anything, you have become one with it.

How can you write about motorcycles and not talk about the many roads we travel. Bikes and roads go together like the whole peanut butter and jelly thing, only we get more out of getting lost on a back road than getting lost going to the kitchen. Just as these highways we ride take us to destinations unknown, they will also take us to places so familiar that we can see them with our eyes closed. The kind of road that feels like walking through the house you grew up in. When you can walk through the house in complete darkness and not bump into anything, you have become one with it.

Have you taken a road you know you’ve never been on only to be convinced you’ve ridden it before? The scenery is vaguely familiar, the signs jump out at you as though its something you’ve already read, but you know deep down you haven’t been here. A classic case of deja vu perhaps? Maybe. It’s more likely a case of Biker’s Perspective. If you ride far enough you will eventually see how the landscape is put together. Rolling hills and green valleys with barns and silos dotting the scenery will eventually take you to either mountains, with their pine trees and elevation changes, or south to a drier climate with the road stretching out as far as you can see. Almost as if we are on a Hot Wheels track randomly snapped together to take us to the best places on earth. Just as long as the road doesn’t do a loop, we’ll be okay.

September 29, 2015February 13, 2016

The Skiddy Basin

Early this Saturday morning during my usual ride to work, I spent a few minutes trying to put some thoughts together. It seems to me on this cool, damp ride that my head was as foggy as the Skiddy Basin as I passed through it. Listening half-heartedly to the radio, Lee Brice was singing I Drive Your Truck setting the framework for my mood and giving me plenty to think about as I followed the road to prosperity.

There are so many triggers throughout our day that cause us to pause or stop and reflect. If you read anything I write you know I spend a lot of time reflecting on life and events that have happened. This is a direct result of my surroundings which by the way, is full of said triggers. The road I travel to work on is a road I’ve downed many times over the last 45 years, and while it’s bumps and curves remain the same my view of it has changed. That old road will always lead to somewhere but it is always taking me back.

That old road will always lead to somewhere but it is always taking me back.

As a kid, the 23 miles to anywhere from White City always seemed to take forever, but the older I get the distance seems insignificant. What’s 20 minutes in a lifetime? Although there are days when I wouldn’t mind sitting on a front porch looking out at an old truck in the driveway, contemplating the sunrise or sunsets. I suppose my blog wouldn’t be about motorcycles if that were the case. A small town guy riding and writing about rocking chairs doesn’t quite fit, does it? Hmm.

There is something about a quiet country highway on a motorcycle, a couple of bridges and the early morning to help you think. A country song on the radio doesn’t hurt either. Maybe the mixture of all the above is the perfect concoction to clear the fog and shorten the old road to anywhere.

September 21, 2015September 22, 2015

The Closer We Get

The older I get the more I find myself looking back. Memories, experiences and lessons learned are usually following me wherever I go and to recall them all I have to do is look back and there they are. But no matter how distant the memory, they truly are closer than we think. Although my childhood seems like an eternity ago, the memories of growing up are fairly clear. Friends and family are a constant reminder of who I am, and I know by the familiarity of the small town I live and grew up in, those memories are real.

But no matter how distant the memory, they truly are closer than we think.

Life’s experiences are an ongoing thing for all of us, but the lessons learned over the years are always reminding us of what or what not to do. Some of us learn a little harder than others, but we eventually learn nonetheless. Looking backwards isn’t necessary in this case as we carry these teachings with us like gold stars on the chalkboard of life. Looking back at all of my life’s experience would indicate I’m smarter now than I have ever been, but my palm slapping my forehead a dozen times a day would argue otherwise.

I also find the older I get the closer I get to the realization that you can’t live forever. I’m kind of caught in the middle of my life at my current age, and with each passing year you can’t help but think about it. I don’t feel that old, but my dad staring back at me in the mirror indicates I’m in denial. You’re only as old as you feel, right? Yeah, me too.